A sad day for the rebels
Today is a sad day in the land of Red Sox Nation. Johnny Damon, our beloved center fielder, has converted to the dark side of the force. The emperor (Steinbrenner) has influenced his thought process and convinced him to sign with the hated New York Yankees.
We all knew that there was a good chance Damon might not re-sign with the Sox, but nobody thought he would stoop this low and sign with the evil empire. There is an unconfirmed report that the emperor sent an imperial starship to pick up Damon from his home in Boston. From there, the long-haired "Jesus Freak" was brought to the Death Star (Yankee Stadium), where he got the grand tour of the empire's evil battleship.
For the purpose of not sounding like a total loser, I'll end this Star Wars theme. But my point is that the Yankees are THE HATED rivals of everyone and everything in Red Sox Nation. As I grew up in Massachusetts, I was always told by my father that the Yankees were bad and the Red Sox were good. It's a part of growing up in the land of the free.
I would have been upset if Damon had signed with the Dodgers or the Angels or the Astros (just throwin' out random teams), but I atleast would be at peace with myself and know that JD would have a good home. When I got the phone call from our good friend AC Cuneo last night about the news, I was sick.
Are the Yankees THAT appealing to players? I thought people in sports didn't like them and what they stood for. Steinbrenner has arguably ruined baseball with his absurd spending, but that doesn't stop him from signing top-tier free agents every offseason. I don't get it. I really don't.
I am going to miss Johnny Damon, and I know everyone else in The Nation will too. But I'll tell you this: When he returns to Fenway in a pinstripe uniform, he will certainly get a whole bunch of booos from the crowd. Will I booo him from the comfort of my apartment? That is to be determined at a later date.
May the force be with you.
posted by Jason @ 1:09 PM
4 Comments:
Dear God,
I didnt get the news because I have been watching Dora the Exporere all morning. This is a very sad day in the Nation. Our hearts sink low with you sweet cousin. Even your smallest Sox fan, Hannah refused to wear her Sox outfit today in defiance. You are not alone....
Love you so much and godspeed JD, you will certainly need it, you freakin sellout!) oops sorry! Just a bit of anger...
Jay,
I've never been a huge fan of Johnny Damon, basically because he throws like a sissy, but I have changed my perspective on the raggity speedster after seeing the numbers he's put up in the past 2-3 years. But now that he has signed with NY, I have completely eliminated him from my memory and I now consider him to be a waste of space. I'm glad that he'll have to cut his girly hair and shave the beard...and I hope he cries while doing it. (sissy!)
I feel much better after bashing good ole Johnny (I had to begin this with some hate, after all, what kind of true baseball player would be a sell-out and join the Yanks after playing for the Almighty RED SOX.) Johnny was clutch for us in '04 and '05, but it is such a bummer to see him sign with the Yankees. This just makes the Sox/Yankees series more interesting and competitive. I can't wait to scalp some tickets and watch the Sox cream NY, and I'll laugh when Johnny goes flying into the center field wall and dislocates his shoulder. GO SOX!!
We'll be fine!! The sox ROCK!
I can't wait to laugh at his hideous throws from center field. Plus without his lucky mullet he won't bat over .300 this year.
The Sox just need to sign the Rocket with all the money they just saved.
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